Monday, January 25, 2010
How could someone 55 be just 10 years older than me? When the hell did that happen?
Most of my dating sites (and yes, I have many, why I don't know, but I still do) are set to search for men up to 10 years my senior.
I usually don't care about age and such. I'm not one of freak out at birthdays, yet you can imagine my shock when guys 54 and 55 started popping up. Clearly these sites had lost their mind. I mean, that's old.
So with great indignation, I went into my account to correct this horrible mistake to find that...
Oh yeah, I'm 45 now. Ergo, ten years older is 55.
Yikes! That's a wake-up call.
And I must take a moment and apologize to my over 50 year old male friends. You must be in some other kind of 50s category. You look older than you once did, I mean you aren't drinking a magic elixir, but you look like a normal person.
Not Santa Claus or Old Man Time.
Really, taking a picture next to a Harley doesn't make you look younger, it makes me worry about you breaking a hip.
Okay, then the worst news. I normally only date 5 years younger than myself which now means the entire 30s are out for me. Every one in my search is over 40.
Seriously when did this happen? I can't even look at a thirty-something without guilt I'm robbing from the cradle.
After perusing several geriatric profiles, I decided to dare to dip into those forbidden 39 year olds. Okay, now they look like Grecian Gods. They have hair and can still pull off stubble.
And the worst realization? In just 5 short years those ten years older will be 60!
Okay, my life goal is now to invent a time machine. #period #endofstatement