Does it matter that when I was pointing at my roommate's chest, she was holding up an antique spice rack for consideration?
Apparently not, according to the looks on the other shopper’s faces.
I have 'Inappropriate Inuendo-itis' and it appears to be contagious.
Ya, pretty much my roomie and I need to stop speaking in public.
When did everything we say suddenly sound so very wrong?
You want examples? I’ll give you examples.
Roomie “How deep can we penetrate?” She was talking about a garden stake into our sandy back yard but try telling that to the Mom who moved her kids out of the patio section.
“Where’d they put our blue balls?” Do not say this aloud at Wal-Mart, unless you want two hundred eyes upon you! Perhaps next time we will go with “Where do you think the colored, solar-powered light globes have been moved?”
Roomie “I want to just drill it!” Add in the hand movement to really sell it and you’ve got quite a crowd. She, of course, was talking about a set of doors that needed to be secured.
“Be gentle. You have to give time for the hole to get bigger before you shove it in there.” In my defense, I was talking about creating a guide hole into delicate tile, but you can imagine the look the handyman gave me.
As you can see, we cause quite the stir whenever out and about with people within ear shot.
So I guess the only thing we can do is pucker up and sit on it! #istherea12step
Posts
Excellent, loved this post. My husband is very inuendo and it drives me nuts!
ReplyDeleteCJ xx
My wife and I love to play this game.
ReplyDeleteI attempt to kiss my wife. I have just washed my bearded face. She complains,
"Hey, I don't stick a big, wet, hairy thing in your face!"
and.....scene.
hahaha!
ReplyDeleteThis is hilarious! I love double speak .. always have my mind in the gutter :D
Someone (long time ago and I can't remember to credit them - if they'd want that) tells the story of looking for some dark furry fabric for a craft project. The young woman at the store had beautiful lustrous long black hair, he says "...and my girlfriend bowls up to her and says 'do you have black fur?'. I swear she glanced downward briefly."
ReplyDeleteAnd a lovely one by my own partner, watching graduates parade through the town in their gowns and silk-lined hoods, some with fur trim.
ReplyDelete"My gown was never that good," she said. "I'd love to have a silky pink thing with fur round it."
hehe, that was a good post. Well done. You are a clever writer.
ReplyDeletehehe, that was a good post. Well done. You are a clever writer.
ReplyDeleteExcellent, loved this post. My husband is very inuendo and it drives me nuts!
ReplyDeleteCJ xx